it is another day, i saw the sunset and i saw it rise, i know for a fact that now it is light outside and at one point it was dark. i slept some when it was dark but i didn't sleep through all of the darkness. i know in terms of words today is yesterday's tomorrow and today is tomorrow's yesterday, at least in accepted circles these words mean something. i know our understanding of the world is trapped in words, and before words there were pictures, this is language and it is the framewaork of basically everything.
along with language there is time. the impenetrable son of God. that's the only way time could exist, something so elusive yet so engrossing. i watch the seconds tick away on my clock. it is all a mess in my mind. if i never die then seconds shouldn't matter too much to me. so living forever is the only way to beat time on the Western front, but how about the Eastern war? if i was born then i am closed in by the days and numbers, trapped in what the want to lable me. August 30th, 1983, that's how they begin measuring. someone a long time ago started counting days when they noticed produce grew differently during different times of the year. they were not content just to feel the change in the weather, those someones figured counting the days would help in preperation. then another person, probably a woman with a man taking credit, decided we had years along with days, and in that year there can be months. it all began with days, there was ngiht and there was morning, the next day. and just like my experience of time, the clock starting at my birth, time as we know it was born when days began, it's lineage then exploding in both directions until we had along with days - years, decades, centuries, hours, minutes, and seconds.
so at birth i came into a world with language and time. now i couldn't tell time or know i was a part of it and i couldn't understand language or tell i was now a player in the world of words but in both instances what i did not know then is now arresting the world.
so we (i) are (am) pressed to ask, what came first, language or time? i don't have an answer and because i don't have an answer i default to the path of less resistance, both are children of the One so neither has beginning or end. so both time and language are my brothers. but wait, this is appaling to logic - how can you claim time and language as your brothers if you were born? doesn't birth preclude you to a beginning and death prove a finite end? well, it is going to depend a lot on how close of a relationship you have to language for my answer to make much sense. the second part of the querry is a shorter answer so to begin there, in simplicity, i am eternal. there is nothing in my way in that direction. and as to the being born issue, true there is a birth certificate with some numbers written on it, things that talk about me, and my mother, and my father. what do those numbers mean though? if my brother time has the same rate of growth as i do? if his explosion in numbers is mearly an illusion of our measurements then both time and i have pulled off a great trick saying i had a finite beginning. i was before the day i was born, i was one hundred and fifty years before i was born. before there was mankind i was born. isn't time a fascinating thing.
so on to the crux of the issue today. along with time and language i have a few other companions with me, the most labouring is pain. yesterday it felt as though someone was trying to take my arm and face off with a pool cue. but here it is, and drink this in for all of you who are fascinated by time and language. all the pain of yesterday is now related to time and language, as without them the pain does not exist. and if they are eternal, if language and time goes on forever then the pain can either last forever or never exist at all. what is a drop of water to an eternally growing ocean. if even said drop came with a flag it may never be seen again. to tell the truth sometimes the pain is so bad i need to leave the flags in the ocean i know, somewhere deep down inside, those are the flags in an eternal ocean.
there is and is not language and time. similarly there is and is not me.
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